He’s back.
Yeah, you know the type. You cringe when his name pops up on your phone or e-mail. You feign yellow fever when he sidles up to your cube. When he walks your way, you tense up and dart to the nearest exit. All the while, you think to yourself: What now?
With this guy, everything is a crisis. And it’s always last minute too. Months ago, you came to his rescue. Now he clings like a lovesick teenager. Every day, he’s back with some new drama. You’re peppered with question after question, sandwiched between monologues that never find their destination. And he is never afraid to interrupt.
Yes, this nuisance is draining your time and energy. He hovers and smothers, pulling you away from more pressing jobs. He steals your focus and trips up your rhythm, and you can’t get back on track afterward. You’re not the type to complain, but you’re tired of being dragged into this. Want to take back your time? Consider the following strategies.
1) Have him come with solutions. You know the drill. He bounces toward you like a ball of nerves. Chances are, he’s hoping you’ll do the work for him. Don’t make it easy for him. Instead, train him how to make it easy for you to help. Start by requiring him to come prepared when you meet. In particular, require him to gather facts and produce a solution and a plan for implementing it, along with potential obstacles and trade-offs involved. In short, your little leech can think it through before dropping in unannounced. You can correct and coach him once you’ve heard his plan.
2) Break it down. "Give a man a fish, and he’ll eat for a day. Teach him to fish, and he’ll eat for a lifetime." There’s a reason clichés, however stale, never die: They illustrate enduring lessons. Your mooch is coming to you for a reason. Maybe you have a talent for simplifying the complex or connecting the disparate. Chances are, your guy dawdles and complicates, unable to conceptualize or discriminate. Regardless, he believes you possess some supernatural gift he couldn’t possibly grasp. Maybe it’s time to take him behind the curtain. Show him how you approach issues. What do you question and evaluate? What steps do you take to determine what’s important and what’s not, and why? What are the warning signs, and when do you seek out others for guidance? Most important, ask him what he thinks. You’ll be surprised how much he actually knows when you nudge him.
3) Keep it about work. You know the routine. He turns up, looking to sponge up your strategies. But he’s not really seeking solutions. He has a different agenda; he’s looking for an opening to unload. Soon enough, it’ll start seeping out—the questioning, complaints, frustrations, and insecurities about everything from management to his midlife crisis. But this is work, not a rerun of Men of a Certain Age. Don’t get sucked into his world. When he strays and grows needy, reel him back to the issues at hand. You can be his friend outside the office. Inside, the biggest favor you can do is keeping him focused and productive.
4) Help him on your schedule. He expects you instantly to drop what you’re doing, knocking you further off schedule. Seems reasonable, right? Before you automatically say yes to him, ask yourself about value and priority. In particular, do his problems greatly affect clients and internal staff? Will they drive dollars or stave off a lawsuit? If not, ask him for a timeline for task completion and set an appointment at a time convenient to you. Don’t feel obliged: Direct him elsewhere for answers. If anything, allude to a quid pro quo to set an expectation that your time comes with a price. Regardless, you can always hope he says thanks by getting it right and not coming back.
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